It's been awhile since an angry political screed has appeared on this site, and God knows there's plenty of material: The incredible assholiness of Homeland Security honcho Michael Chertoff (seriously, how does this guy still have a job?) or Hillary Clinton's defensiveness about her graceless "It took a white guy to pass the Civil Rights Act" comment or, just today, Iraqi defense minister Abdul Qadir's stated belief that his country will need U.S. forces around until, oh, 2018 at least, because...well, because it's easier to have someone else do his job.
Yes, I could write about any of those things, but the AP has a story about Michael Stipe being dismissed as a juror!
Stipe told the judge presiding over a case involving the attempted sexual assault of a middle-school girl that he couldn't be impartial, since he's been the target of stalkers himself.
A few thoughts:
1) Coming a week after Reuters reported that Stipe finds Mike Huckabee "charming", I wonder what stories the wire services will bring us next. "Stipe Says Two And A Half Men Is 'Kinda Funny'" or "Stipe Finds Lint On Shirt, Flicks It Into Wastebasket"? I can't wait.
2) Why hasn't REM broken up yet? Seriously, guys, it's been ten, twelve years since anybody's cared. Once Bill Berry took a hike, the band ceased to exist. Everyone else knows it. Why don't you? (And yeah, I realize Berry came back long enough to play with them for the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame induction...but doesn't that just offer further proof of how over they are?)
3) Remember when REM gave an official okey-doakes to let Chris Elliot's absurdist sitcom Get A Life use Stand as its theme music? Remember how that immediately gave the show an imprimatur of coolness? Remember when anyone could use the word "cool" to describe REM? Remember how great Murmur and Document used to be, even though nobody ever listens to them anymore?
4) Seriously, who the hell would stalk Michael Stipe?
